Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Day 14 (continued)

Lots of interesting things happened to us on the way to Vienna and in Vienna tonight.

First, something I forgot to tell you about in Salzburg...

In old Salzburg we happened upon an exciting game of giant chess. I took some videos of the game so that you can watch the suspenseful match.

Now that that's out of the way, the continuation of the last blog...

We were on the same train that Tyler lost his wallet and we made sure that we sat on the same car. We unfortunately couldn't sit in the same section (on this train there's 6 chairs in a room with a sliding door and the section we wanted was full of people), but we got the section right beside it. The people in the other section where we wanted to search for the wallet didn't leave at the stop at Linz, so we were going to have to search for the wallet after the train stopped at Vienna.

In the meantime, a 20-something guy, who we later found out was Romanian, came to sit in our section. He had a beer in hand and later went to get another beer. I still find it weird seeing beer being drunk everywhere. Everything was quiet until about 30 minutes before we arrived in Vienna, when a large Russian man banged on our window and pointed at Tyler. I got worried thinking maybe Tyler looked at him in the wrong way and now we'd get in a fight with this giant of a man. Instead he was a Chelsea fan and had noticed Tyler's Chelsea FC jersey (that he was wearing at the time).

Then I could relax...but wait! The Romanian guy in our section has started talking to us in English with a heavy accent. He started talking to us about football and what teams we liked. Then he asked me what the best team now was and I answered Real Madrid, but it turns out I was wrong as according to him the answer is CFR Cluj, a Romanian club. Luckily, I know a lot about soccer/football and I know the club CFR Cluj, so I didn't get him angry. Eventually, he started talking about Vienna about how it's so beautiful and the women have BIG breasts. And he did a gesture when he mentioned BIG breasts. Supposedly Vienna has big everything, big buildings, big beauty, big money, and BIG breasts. Soon he started talking about the money he made in Romania and how much more money he's making in Salzburg (where he now lives). He said that he made 250 euros a month in Romania, but now he makes 500 euros a month in Salzburg. It's a good thing I didn't tell him how much a month I make in Canada as he might have robbed me. Soon he began talking about his girlfriend, whom he calls his bi*** (must be a common Romanian name), and that she makes more money than him. You see, she works in a "club" in Salzburg. Hmmm...must have missed that place while we were there... From there he started telling us about the prostitutes in Vienna. In case you're wondering, they come out at 0100 hours, cost about 100-200 euros, and have BIG breasts. He also said that the male prostitutes aren't that good. At this time he was also talking about lap dances and when he said lap dances he would rub my leg, just so we knew what he was talking about (heavy accent remember). Then he asked us how much a prostitute costs in Canada, and being the honest guys that we are, we told him the truth: $152.48/hr. (Not that we'd know or anything). But the story does not end there. No, now he wanted our phone numbers so he could hook us up with a girl. Unfortunately, we "didn't have any phones that worked in Europe" so we're still lonely in Vienna. As he was leaving, he gave us his address in Salzburg and told us we could stay with him and his bi*** anytime we wanted to. In case you're interested, his address is 29 Linzer Bunderstrasse, that coincidentally was very close to our hostel in Salzburg. He then ran to catch his train to Romania.

After that cultural exchange, Tyler went to look for his wallet. Way down, under the seat, in the dirtiest corner of the cabin, was Tyler's wallet. Yes, it was still on the train! Unfortunately the 60 euros were missing, but at least his credit card and debit card were still there! Oh wait, they're canceled. Oh well, it's a nice wallet... I hope that whoever took the 60 euros bought something really nice for themselves.

We easily found our hostel in Vienna, that while it's not as nice as the one in Salzburg, is still pretty good, and yes it has a TV with a couple of English channels.

Tyler and I were getting hungry, so we ate at this fabulous restaurant not too far from oour hostel. We both got a huge garden salad with assorted greens, tomatoes, peppers, and topped with the best French dressing. Next came the main course of chicken, breaded to perfection (a nice golden brown), with fried potatoes on the side. It's all some kind of recipe that was passed down from an American colonel. In case you're ever in Vienna, the name of the place was KFC. I wish this restaurant would expand to Canada because it's fabulous.

But no, the stories do not end there! Walking to this internet cafe, not to far from our hostel, we are stopped by a black man with the reddest eyes you've ever seen. He asks us why we're in Austria, (I guess we don't look Austrian), and we tell him that it's for vacation. Well, it turns out that the Austrians are evil anti-Semites that murdered countless Jews and blacks a few years ago, and now it's all being covered up. He says that we should visit a concentration camp and get the real history of Vienna. He then lets us know that he wants to go back to his home country of Gambia and make a lot of money. And how is he going to make a lot of money? Because he speaks fluent English. I think I'm going to go to Gambia and get rich since I also speak English fluently... Anyway, he informes us that he's very drunk and is heading to a store where you roll up something called a "joint" and smoke it. Being the upstanding, morally clean guys we are, we had no idea what he was talking about so we politely removed ourselves from the conversation. He sent us off with by pounding our arms with his hands and then we went on our way. Tyler now has some mysterious white marks on his coat. Who knows where they came from?

4 comments:

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Anonymous said...

Tessy:

You'll be happy to know that it was the Habs 100 anniversary last night, and they won their game against Boston!

Europe sounds amazing!!!!

Anonymous said...

Hey Jim, maybe you could learn a thing or two from the beer guzzling locals! Sounds like my kind of place. I seem to get in trouble when I drink beer in public around here....LOLLOLLOL

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